There Will Be No Party! False Alarm

I regret to inform you that the party you were all invited to as been canceled. And not even until further notice either. It's just been canceled. Now, for those of you are feeling indignat that you didn't get your invitation, it's probably because you have a cheery disposition. I was having a pity party, and there is no place for optimism there.

It's a shame too. I had found the most morose decorations. I had also purchased quite a few humidifiers so it would feel like it was raining, which seems like a nice touch. Besides which, it would make it that much more pitiful to open soggy gifts that are also empty, or better yet, filled with IOU's. And pitiful is what I was striving for, after all. The cake was to be undercooked, with salt added instead of sugar, and the rest of the eats- laced with salmonilla.

It would have been such a good pity party too. But then I went and did the dumbest thing EVER. I included my mom is my plans, and I'll tell you...there's never been another person alive who's better at hearing you feel sorry for yourself, and then saying something so horrendously sympathetic about someone else in worse straights, and making you feel very very silly. That's right, after listening to me sniffle and whine for a few minutes, she said something to the effect of "It's a good thing you don't live in Japan!"

Yep. Conversation stopper right there. Not much you can say to that is there?

So from the very bottom of my heart, thanks mom. Thankyou for putting things in perspective for me, and putting an end to my fantastically selfish pity party. No, my life is not what I want it to be. I do, however, have a home with four walls and a roof. Hot water coming out of my taps, and a working toilette. There is food in my fridge, clean clothes on my back. I have a phone to call someone, and a car to get where I need to be. My children are safe, and healthy, and happy. I know where all the people I love are, and that they are safe, happy, healthy and at least as well provided as I. Heat comes out of my vents when it is cold, and lights come on when it is dark. The air I breathe is safe, as is the food I eat. I do not live in fear for my life, or for the lives of my family. I have a place to go when I am sick, where I will be cared for. I have a place to buy medicine when I need it. The water I drink is clean and fresh.
Not only do I have everything I need to survive, but I have what I need to live. Happily too, if I could get out of my own way. I have a computer, to learn on and to communicate and reach out to anyone and anywhere. I have books to read, a television to watch, movies and music to entertain myself with. There are board games in the basement, and decks of cards on top of the fridge. My house is usually filled with the sound of laughing children, and tapping dressup shoes. There are happy little make up smudges at roughly a 6 year olds level. Toys are scattered about in every room in the house. My back yard is (or will be when it's warmer) green and lush with grass and flowers. It is large too, I have a lot of room to enjoy my children.

I have so many blessings, so much to be happy for. So life doesn't look like I thought it would today...but mom is right. It looks a hell of a lot better than a lot of other peoples lives. There are many people who would love to have just ONE of my many blessings. It's a sad thing, when it takes a woman who's been through so much and who has so much right to be angry and pitiful to tell me not to feel sorry for myself.

So, longs story short. the party is off. I'm celebrating instead, with a quiet thanks for all that I've been given.